The Importance Of Letting Go
I’m gonna get real with you now.
The one thing that I have struggled with the most in my 25 years is being unable to let go. To let go of my past. To let go of bad habits. To let go of unhealthy relationships and situations. To let go of anything in general. I'm a hoarder. Not so much in a physical sense, but in an emotional one. It's almost as if I cling to my mistakes, anxieties, regrets and past relationships. Guilt, shame, regret, embarrassment and grief have all defined me over the years because of my inability to free myself from the things that bind me. Sounds unhealthy, right? You can just imagine what this has done to my mental health over the years!
It's been a struggle. However hard I've tried to banish my past and all those feelings that it had left behind, I just couldn't. And believe me, I tried. I can't even explain to you how many times I've written letters and then burnt them, meditated on my feelings, gone back into that pain trying to find the root of the problem, cried my eyes out, talked about it, performed cleansing rituals - the list goes on. I felt as if I'd tried everything, and none of it was working. I mean, maybe it eased it a little bit but not enough for me to move on with my life.
And that's the worst and frustrating part of it all. When you're living in your past, you can't move forward. Being unable to let go is like being stuck in quick-sand - you're literally stuck and then you start to sink. Slowly at first, but then faster and faster until you can no longer breathe and then you're submerged.
It took me a while, but I finally realised what was going on. I realised why I was struggling to let go. I realised that although I was trying real bloody hard, I wasn't trying at all. Because I was scared of letting go. I was scared of letting go of my suffering because it was all I'd ever known. Self-sabotage at it's best! I was clinging to my past, my habits, my relationships, because I was scared that life would change as soon as they were gone.
Because letting go invokes change in your life, and I have a major fear of the unknown. By releasing the past and things that no longer work towards your future goals, you are essentially losing a part of yourself in order to find another. And I wasn't sure that I wanted to find another part of myself.
As humans, we have a tendency to cling to the past, or to things that we don’t need any more. We can’t help it, it’s just something that we do. But, we don't realise how unhealthy this habit really is. By holding onto these things, we stop ourselves from moving on with our lives and reaching our fullest potential. Constantly looking back or holding on to the things that are stopping your from progressing isn’t going to get you very far at all, as I quickly learned.
In learning to let go, we allow ourselves to break free from unhealthy attachments and habits, whether those are relationships, events, possessions or ideas, providing ourselves with a clean slate for the future. Releasing that which no longer serves you gives you the go ahead to start afresh. To move on.
As you grow older and wiser, you will instantly know what needs to be held on to and what needs to be let go of. Your intuition will let it be known. It will tell you when you need to walk away. The problem is, when it does, are you going to listen?
As humans, we have so much potential, more than we even realise. There are so many opportunities available to us and so much that we can achieve, but more often than not, we choose to hold back. We would rather stay paralysed in our current situation, than release and step forward.
As much as I believe that we build our own future, I also believe in destiny. And the sad truth is, there are just some things in our lives that aren't meant to stick around. You could do everything in your power to try and make it work for you, to try and make it stay, but eventually you will outgrow it and you will have to leave it behind.
These changes that you don't want to happen, are exactly what you need to happen. To learn. To grow. To transform. And yes, it's will be hard and uncomfortable and heartbreaking, but it's also necessary for you to live your best life. You can't attract new and positive things when your energy is already being taken up by the old. Your only going to attract things that you no longer need or want in your life.
Letting go is to stop struggling to save something that can't be saved. Letting go is to stop resisting changes that are inevitable.
Letting go is to move forward with our lives. To leave the past where it belongs. To accept the inevitable in all it's glory.
What are you holding on to right now that is stopping your from moving forward in your life? What needs to be let go of in order to transform?
Focus on that thing. Focus on why it's got you so paralysed. Accept it's demise. Promise yourself that you will no longer waste your precious energy on it and then let it go.
I hope this post helped you understand why it’s necessary to let go of the things that you no longer need - physically and emotionally! What have been your experiences with letting go? Let me know in the comments below!
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